Patience is necessary. Charging forward isn’t always the right path.

But patience can also become an excuse to stay in your comfort zone, to not venture into new territory.

This is my default. What about you?

​I remind myself to always be making small steps in some direction, even if it’s not the one I prefer. If I’m waiting for one area to develop, at least I’m still making progress and not settling into a rut where I’ll wake up years later to find opportunity has passed me by.

I don’t know how many times I heard this growing up. And I bet you did too!

Waiting is hard.

Waiting when you don’t know if the thing you’re waiting for will ever happen is even harder.

Waiting when you aren’t even sure that waiting is the right move is torture.

We just have to take an honest look at our circumstances, do the best we can, hope for the best, and readjust our choices as needed and as new information comes in.

​And we have to be ready to leap when patience is no longer a virtue.

I’ve owned dogs for most of my life. I groom dogs professionally. I spend nearly every day around dogs and dog people. So, I like to think I know a thing or two about properly caring for your dog.

But this book proved I still have a lot to learn!

Therefore, my book recommendation for April is The Forever Dog by Rodney Habib and Dr. Karen Shaw Becker.

If you’re not a dog person, you may find a few tidbits of information that you can apply to your own life and health, but it’s probably not the book for you. Chances are, though, you have a four-legged friend in your life.

​This book is stuffed full of all the ways we’re inadvertently hurting those we love and whose health and well-being depend almost exclusively on us. And it’s also full of advice for how we can do better.
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The purpose of The Forever Dog is to educate dog lovers on how to extend the health span—as well as the lifespan—of our furry companions.

The lives of dogs are closely entwined with the humans they live with. On one hand, that’s great; we have an ever-present source of affection and interaction in an increasingly lonely world. On the other hand, we’ve become so enmeshed that their health mirrors our own. And let’s be honest: a lot of us aren’t doing so great on that front.

​Because of human intervention, dogs are living shorter and shorter lives and suffering from many of the same ailments as humans: cancer, diabetes, anxiety, heart disease, and more.
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Some of the advice in this book was new and surprising, and some of it was so obvious and commonsense that I’m still kicking myself for not coming to the same conclusions on my own.

First of all, while I may occasionally indulge in some highly processed foods (*cough* boxed mac ’n cheese *cough*), I know it’s not the best thing for me and shouldn’t be the main staple of my diet. Why, then, did it never occur to me that kibble is essentially the same thing? It’s highly processed and disturbingly shelf stable, two attributes I would never choose for myself. It’s only nutritionally complete because they add all of the nutrients back in the form of supplements. And we’re feeding our dogs this diet every day, exclusively in many cases.

Then, there’s the fact that dogs are natural athletes but spend most of their time cooped up indoors or strolling around the backyard. We need daily exercise outdoors, so why wouldn’t they?

And they need good sleep, a low-stress environment, and mental stimulation. Sound familiar? It’s the constant refrain of most health professionals, but both dogs and humans are living in a world of bright lights at all hours, loud noises, and constant electronic buzzing.

So, the answer is to change our daily routines and serve them a homemade diet, right?

​I never realized the risks of making a serious, or even fatal, error. It’s way too easy to accidentally deprive your dog of vital nutrients if you don’t exactly follow carefully constructed and nutritionally complete recipes.
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Unfortunately, I operate on a budget, and I’m already buying Monty the best kibble that fits into that budget. So, I’ve decided to supplement that kibble with a spoonful of a puree I make from kitchen scraps, like carrot peels and apple cores, and some basic veggies and sardines. His head just about exploded the first time I added sardines to his meal, and he’s still insanely enthusiastic about mealtime.

For treats, he gets bits and pieces of whatever fruits and veggies I happen to be eating at the moment. He’s developed a taste for just about everything but cucumbers. Carrots, apples, and strawberries are some of his favorites. I just have to be careful not to give him any chocolate, grapes/raisins, or onions, as those are toxic to dogs.

At the moment, he’s chewing on the stem from a head of cauliflower that he pulled out of the trash. Sure, it makes a mess, and I’ll eventually have to sweep up shreds of cauliflower. But it’s an incredibly healthy chew toy.

We’ve also started taking morning walks around the neighborhood. Those are only happening on Sundays for the time being, though, because I’m working on some issues he has with barking furiously at everyone he meets. (Ah, the joys of training a terrier!)

But I’m also taking him on occasional trips to the dog park in town to get him some play time.

​And finally, I’ve started unplugging my wi-fi router at night. I don’t know if it makes a difference, but do I really need internet access while I’m sleeping?
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​It’s full of practical tips based on scientific studies. The authors also provide recommendations for whatever level of changes you’re ready to make. They espouse the theory that small changes are better than no changes.
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I understand that the statistics and scientific findings in the first section are meant to illustrate the necessity for making changes in our dogs’ lifestyles, but to be honest, it’s a bit scary and depressing. Especially when you realize that their health journeys mirror our own.
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The authors also lean toward the extreme side of pet care, which tends to be expensive, time consuming, and labor intensive. While they give practical tips for making small changes, I wish they focused more on advice for how the average person could easily incorporate their advice into our everyday lives.
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​I loved this book and found it full of great information, some that I can use right now and some that I’ll keep in mind for possible future reference. And I believe that learning new things is almost always a good idea. As long as we’re careful not to go too far to extremes.

At some point, you have to just hit Send.

Could you have continued to make improvements?
Maybe.
Could there still be some errors?
Probably.
Could the readers hate it?
Sure.
Could you have goofed up and sent the wrong file?
Yep.
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But the thing won’t fulfill its purpose if you don’t send it off. An imperfect document shared is always better than a perfect one that never sees the light of day.

Do you have brilliant thoughts that flash in your head at random times and then disappear soon after? Me too!

Why don’t we write them down?

Maybe your insight is just what the world needs.

Maybe you look back a day or a week later and find that brilliant thought wasn’t so brilliant after all.

​But you’ll never know unless you write it down!

My book recommendation for this month isn’t exactly a book in the sense we usually think of one. It’s not a novel or a memoir or even a how-to. Rather, it’s a book that’s partially already written and partially waiting to be written by me. I’m talking about a reading journal.

Your life isn’t the same as mine; the things I find valuable might be useless to you. But then again, you might find value in them too.

​And one of the things I’m finding value in right now is My Reading Life, a book journal created by Anne Bogel.
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First, there’s basic curiosity. I read a lot of books throughout the year and find it hard to keep track of them all. (I finished more than fifteen in January and February.)
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Then, there’s the segment of this blog where I recommend books that I’ve enjoyed or found valuable. Life can get hectic, and I don’t always have a chance to write a post right after I read a book, but I don’t want to forget important information. Keeping a book journal allows me to take note of interesting points and quotes.
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Probably. Actually, I’m sure there are all kinds of apps and websites that help you track your reading. I’ve tried keeping track digitally through services like BookBub and Goodreads, but I find it cumbersome to pull out an electronic device and pull up the app or website whenever I start a new book or want to record some information.
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There’s just something about putting pencil to paper that comes more easily to me. Ironically, I find less friction in the action of physically writing in a book.
​

Before purchasing this particular book journal, of course, I read a bunch of reviews, and while I’ve found most of the reviews helpful, I disagree with the people who said there was plenty of room for recording your thoughts.

This is true for many of the books I read. I read and reread a lot of books for pleasure and really only need to note whether or not I enjoyed them and why.

​However, there are some books I have a lot more thoughts on, and each page of the journal only has so much space.

In summary, despite the fact that it’s not perfect, I love this little book. It’s cute and handy and contains multiple lists of new books and authors for me to explore.

Once it’s completely filled out, I may or may not get another one, or I may just get a regular journal to keep track of my reading and customize it to what I want.

​What about you? Do you keep track of your reading habits? If so, what do you use? I’d love to hear about it!

​Exclamation points are like profanity.

• Their appropriateness depends on the situation and your audience.
• Sprinkling one or two in from time to time can enhance your message.
• But using too many diminishes their impact and makes you look foolish.

​If you do much reading at all, you’ve probably seen these two words mixed up, one for the other. It’s one of the more common errors in the English language.
​

Compliment refers to speaking highly of someone or something.

We all complimented the cook on the excellent meal.
His face turned beet red at the shower of compliments over his roasted chicken.

Complement refers to the supplementation of something.

That bread you chose was the perfect complement to the soup.
This scarf will complement your outfit nicely.

​In grammar, a complement is anything needed to complete a phrase. In the above example, your outfit is the complement of the verb will complement because complement is a transitive verb, and the sentence wouldn’t make sense without saying what the scarf complements. Not confusing at all, right?
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The main problem is that both words sound identical and look almost identical as well. It’s just one letter, so what’s the big deal?

They can both be either nouns or verbs. Even some of their uses can appear to overlap. But these two terms actually have distinct meanings.

​My go-to trick for remembering which to use is to ask myself if something or someone is being praised or completed. Complete = Complement. The scarf completes the outfit, and the bread completes the soup. But the cook was being praised.

February is the month of Valentine’s Day and love. In fact, it’s only a week away!

Now, before you start in on any rants about the commercialization of Valentine’s Day and how it’s a made-up holiday created by soulless marketing departments, greeting-card companies, and candy producers, let me say that I don’t care.

While I’ve been guilty of being a Valentine’s Day grinch at times in my life, I’ve come to realize that you don’t have to buy into all of the trappings to celebrate love.

I agree that the amount of money and the lack of thought thrown into this holiday are ridiculous. But there’s nothing wrong with celebrating love. And what better way to do that than by reading a good love story?

Now, if your lip automatically curled at the mention of romance novels and you’re thinking that they’re all ridiculous and reinforce negative gender stereotypes, let me say that you’re obviously reading the wrong ones. Yes, there are a ton out there that are unrealistic and, quite frankly, unhealthy.

​But in honor of the month of love, I challenge you to try something different. Which is why I’m recommending Neanderthal Seeks Human by Penny Reid.
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Neanderthal Seeks Human is a romance novel for those who’ve had it with heaving bosoms and quivering this and pulsing that and all of the trite trappings of traditional romance.

(Don’t get me wrong; I’m not shaming readers of traditional romance. There are some very well-written romance novels out there, ones that don’t promote unhealthy relationships and stereotypes.)

This book is a smart romance. (Don’t believe me? It actually says so on the cover.) The protagonist is highly intelligent but socially awkward. I once heard the author describe her as high functioning on the autism spectrum.

And her love interest is just as quirky: highly successful in some areas and highly challenged and struggling in others.

Actually, all of Reids characters have some quirk or feature that might be considered odd by some but that just makes them human and real. The message is that no matter how weird you are, there’s a match for you; it’s all a matter of perspective.

​I found the characters so relatable. Let’s face it—we’re all kinda weird. We may not all be the same weird, but it’s nice to read about people who are just as weird as we are in the many different ways human beings are weird and unique. And their oddities aren’t just tolerated; those oddities are what make the characters unique, endearing, and relatable.
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While Neanderthal Seeks Human is fairly mild compared to many books in the romance genre, it does still contain scenes involving sex. And while some of Reid’s later books do become a bit more descriptive of these scenes, the purpose isn’t about shock value.

The story is about the relationship between two people and the doubts and insecurities we all struggle with in our own heads. It’s romance, not erotica.

​However, if you object to reading about sex or sex outside of marriage, this isn’t the book for you. There are some wonderful love stories and talented authors in the Christian fiction section that I’ll probably feature at a later date.

If you’ve been looking for a fun, quirky, relatable love story that’s a bit out of the ordinary, I highly recommend picking up Neanderthal Seeks Human! You can find Penny and a list of her books, as well as links to the different platforms to purchase on her website, or if you want to check her out without the financial commitment, you can likely find her books at your local library. Also, Overdrive and Hoopla, both of which you may be able to access through your library, carry many of them if you prefer ebooks.

As humans, we like to point fingers and deny that something is our fault. Because if it’s our fault, we’re responsible for doing something about it.

Please don’t think this is just another gripe about cancel culture or an attempt to blame victims. This is me looking at my life and recognizing that I’m just as guilty of this tendency as anyone else.

The last couple of years have been hard, and part of what’s been so hard is that we feel helpless in the face of everything that’s going on in the world around us.

​And that’s why Extreme Ownership struck a chord with me. And that’s why I chose it for my book recommendation for January.
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In this book, Jocko Willink and Leif Babin take what they learned as Navy SEALs and as leaders within that organization and present those lessons to anyone who wants to grow as a leader in business or even in life in general.
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Humans are social creatures, so we’re constantly moving back and forth on a continuum of leading and following. And this book teaches us how to improve the only thing we can truly control: ourselves. We have to take ownership of our role in situations and honestly ask ourselves what we could have done and could do in the future to get a better outcome.
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While the book is written expressly for leaders, especially within business and the military, the principles can be applied to any situation in life that requires leadership: family, friendships, volunteer organizations, and more.

Also, I expected a book written by SEALs to take a tough, bullheaded stance, but I was pleasantly surprised to find the authors quite progressive, fair, and open minded in their views.

Don’t get me wrong; they take no excuses and are more focused on action and results than on feelings. If you’re looking for someone who will explore your feelings with you and tease out what makes you the way you are, this is not the book for you.

The authors aren’t therapists. They’re action oriented and practice a high level of self-discipline and expect the same of others. They recognize weaknesses that exist in all of us, themselves included, but the existence of weaknesses and faults doesn’t excuse failing to work to recognize and eliminate them.

​For anyone who wants to learn practical, actionable principles for becoming a better leader, this is one of the best books I’ve ever read.
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Extreme Ownership contains descriptions of combat and some of the injuries and horrors involved. The authors aren’t overly graphic in their descriptions, in my opinion, especially compared to some of the things we see on television today.
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However, if you’re sensitive to that sort of thing or have any kind of trauma that makes descriptions of war and combat difficult to endure, just be aware of what you’re getting into in reading this book.
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Jocko and Leif have written other books since Extreme Ownership came out in 2015, including The Dichotomy of Leadership and Leadership Strategy and Tactics. They also run Echelon Front, a leadership consulting company.

And Jocko has a bunch of other projects out there. (Honestly, I have no idea how he gets so much done!)

He has several podcasts out, such as the Jocko Podcast, and while each episode is fairly long (often running two to three hours), I enjoy listening to his point of view on things because I think listening to several varying opinions is good for you. (But I feel I should repeat the trigger warning on this; he reviews a number of books that have some pretty graphic descriptions of the horrible, evil things human beings are capable of.)

And he has even written a couple of series for children (obviously age appropriate, without the difficult content). I’ve read a couple in the Warrior Kid series and even gifted the first book to my nephew. Since I’m an adult and admittedly slightly out of touch with the tastes of kids (at least, until I get more feedback from my nephew), I can’t attest to the appeal to that age group yet. But the books contain some important lessons on responsibility and self-discipline.

You can find the books and leadership consulting service at the Echelon Front website and the podcasts wherever you prefer to listen to podcasts.